EPISODE NUMBER: 8112 (June 14, 2012)
GUESTS: Steve Coll
SEGMENTS: Marijuana Legalization as Election Hot-Button Issue | Super PAC Super Cash & 24-Hour Political Ad Channels | Cheating Death – Penis Curvature Cures & Single Women Sleep Aids | Sign Off – Bon Voyage, Peter Gwinn
SUIT REPORT: Dark suit | White shirt | Navy/white stripped tie
VIDEOS: Thursday, June 14, 2012
Marijuana Legalization as Election Hot-Button Issue
Because the latest Gallup poll has them separated by less than a percentage point. In 2004 we had an equally close race between Bush and Kerry. That year, Bush won because eleven states had anti-marriage ballot initiatives that drove conservatives to the polls.
Super PAC Super Cash & 24-Hour Political Ad Channels
A billion dollars on the election! Just more evidence that Obama’s presidency has lead to wasteful spending.
Shockingly, there may be a downside to having our political process engulfed by a tsunami of tsumoney. There is so much Super Pac cash to be spent this year, that TV networks could actually run out of air time to sell more political ads. There’s a finite number of commercials? You wouldn’t guess that from watching movies on TNT.
She is currently trailing her likely democratic opponent by twenty points but all of that is about to change… That’s right Linda Lingle is using campaign funds to start her own cable channel. So now you’ll be able to see her anytime you turn on the TV. Just like Senator Seacrest.
I say this important breakthrough in free speech is too important to keep isolated on Hawaii like Tom Selleck or leprosy.
Cheating Death – Penis Curvature Cures & Single Women Sleep Aids
Nation, you know me. I’m the picture of health and I have been heavily photoshopped.
As always Cheating Death is brought to you by Prescott Pharmaceuticals but if the FDA’s asking, we’re Herb’s Appliances.
Well, good news, fellas, Auxilium pharmaceuticals has a new cure for sufferers of fusilli phallus. It’s called Xiaflex.
In a trial of over 400 patients the average curvature for men treated with Xiaflex went from 49 degrees to 31 degrees a year later. That is great news for patients and for the penis protractor industry.
Side effects of Dr. Prescott’s crotch-thotics may include: headface, admiral’s clubfoot, and Bilious Dee Williams.
Folks, if you’re an insomniac there’s good news from my favorite sleep aid CNN Headline News.
Vacsa-Jeff: Yeah. No funny stuff. I might not even sleep. I’ll just watch you all night.
Stephen: Of course, severe cases of insomnia may require a higher dosage so Vacsa-Jeff will bring his friend, Vacsa Terry.
Vacsa-Jeff: Oh, that’d be great. Uh, he’s going through kind of a rough time right now. Kind of a rough patch and he really needs a place to crash. You- Don’t ask about Deb.
Vacsa-Terry: Did she call?
Stephen: No. Side effects of Vacsa-Jeff include missing dvd players, sudden loss of beer, and Deb.
Vacsa-Terry: Did she call?
Well, that’s it for Cheating Death brought to you by Prescott Pharmaceuticals. Your body will thank you because your torso has grown a mouth. Until next time, I’ll see you in health!
Stephen: So, if I’m the president of uh, of uh, of an emerging country, okay? And we find out we’ve got oil. You know? Like, right off our coast or coming out of our volcanoes. Whatever it is.
Stephen: I’m the president of uh, let’s say, El Diablo. Okay? That’s the name of my, my, my country. I’m president for life. Uh, what does Exxon come say to me?
Steve: Exxon comes says to you: do business with us, you’ll get your project done on time, our safety record will be excellent, you’ll get your money really fast, you can do with it what you want. After they leave the room, the Chinese might come in and say we’ll do that, we’ll also give you some tanks, we’ll give you a security counsel veto and so you’ll have to think: are the Chinese really going to perform as well as Exxon Mobile? Exxon Mobile’s advantage is that they actually produce oil and gas better most companies in the world but they-
Stephen: And-and the check clears.
Steve: The check clears. They have triple a A credit rating. The United States government no longer does. That’s a sense of their, kind of, position in the world. They’ve got a durable business model-
Stephen: So, I think if I’m president of El Diablo, I’m going with Exxon then.
Steve: And you also potentially get the idea that, if someone tries to come at your presidential palace and dislodge you, for some reason. Not for misrule, I’m sure but-
Stephen: No, no, no! My people love me!
Steve: Yeah, I’m sure they do.
Stephen: What about environmental record? Because as the president of El Diablo, I’ve got beautiful white sandy beaches. We’ve got the Exxon Valdez as part of their legacy. Um, did that affect the company in any way? Are they careful?
Steve: It did. It transformed their attitude towards, uh, safety and operational performance because it was a huge trauma inside the company. They never really recovered from it, in terms of their reputation, but they have become incredibly rigorous and rule bound corporation. To the point where they tried to wring all human fallibility out of their daily operations. It’s a very engineering led, manual driven company.
Stephen: Did you get access to the executives at Exxon to work on this book?
Steve: A little bit, you know, it was, uh-
Stephen: Good people?
Steve: Uh, very smart people. Uh, very dedicated to what they do. And very driven by morality. The current chief executive recently told a magazine, his favorite book is Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand. Which is a touchstone-
Stephen: Mine too.
Steve: Exactly, yeah.
Stephen: I love it’s message of, uh… f*@k them, I’ve got mine.
Sign Off – Bon Voyage, Peter Gwinn